When we hear “teen vices,” many of us picture 15-year-olds slamming doors, rolling eyes, or secretly texting under the covers. But what if the “teen phase” is showing up earlier than we thought? What if your 8-year-old is already navigating the emotional weight of a world they barely understand?
Parenting With Susan says:
“Teenage can now begin as early as eight. Not by age, but by emotional transition.”
From shifting hormones to overwhelming digital exposure, today’s children are growing up faster than ever. And with that early maturity comes early vulnerability to behaviors we traditionally associate with teens.
Common Teen Vices Emerging Earlier:
- Lying
Children lie for many reasons: to escape punishment, to protect themselves, or because they’re confused about their own desires. But consistent lying may be a deeper cry for trust and safety.
- Stealing
A missing snack? Money vanishing from your purse? It’s easy to react with punishment. But children may steal to feel in control, to gain attention, or because they don’t understand boundaries.
- Drinking
Shocking? Yes. But exposure to alcohol culture through media or family habits can make experimentation tempting. Children may mimic what they see, not fully understanding the consequences.
- Isolation
Headphones in. Door shut. Answers reduced to shrugs. Emotional shutdown isn’t always rebellion; it’s often confusion, fear, or shame. Even 9-year-olds can start exhibiting this distancing behavior.
Why So Early?
- Puberty Starts Earlier: Due to changes in diet, hormones, and environment, many children enter puberty before age 10.
- Information Overload: children have access to adult-level content without adult-level processing tools.
- Emotional Acceleration: The pressure to “grow up” emotionally has never been greater.
“You cannot discipline a child into emotional maturity. You guide them into it.” — Susan Tayo, It’s Gone All Wrong: Is It Too Late?
What Can Parents Do?
- Stop and Reconnect: Instead of reacting, pause. Your child may be acting out, but underneath is a need you haven’t seen yet.
- Create Safe Space: Children will lie or shut down if they fear your reaction. Make your home a space where truth doesn’t cost them love.
- Learn and Equip Yourself: Parenting has changed. You need tools, not just instincts.
Recommended Reads:
- Let’s Talk by Susan Tayo — Learn how to rebuild open conversations.
- It’s Gone All Wrong: Is It Too Late? Volumes I – III by Susan Tayo — Understand the roots of difficult behaviors and how to guide your child through them.
Final Word
Being a parent today isn’t about control, it’s about connection. Whether your child is 8 or 18, it’s never too late to start fresh, reset the relationship, and guide with calm strength.
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